1/05/2004 01:39:00 AM 0 Comments »

yey! bought a new pair of boots today. very nice, thank you. all i can say is that it's comfortable, nice height heel, good brand and it's about 75% off. nice one!

kak jua also just arrived from malaysia. nice to see the house is full again. then we watched kak jua's recorded video cam of her cousin's wedding last christmas. nice huh. like to see other ppl's wedding, with all the hantaran, the nice costumes + beautiful makeups and hairdos. i like kirin's wedding; it's simple yet adequate. yup, adequate. some ppl like to have a big and grand wedding, while other ppl prefers a simple ceremony. i guess i'm the latter one. the hantaran was nice. but the credit went to the 'pak andam'...very2 good in making kirin 'glowed'. wah wah..cant wait to get married! (blushing..huhu). but i guess almost everybody want to get married, though i admit there are some minor ones who have the opposite view. in my case, i view marriage as a union with your love ones. it's not about celebration, nor the relatives' gathering, nor telling ppl about that ceremony, nor all the gifts, makeups, beautiful things of being 'raja sehari'. it's about you and that person who you've chosen to spend the rest of your life with. the one. so, i am very much prefer to have a very simple wedding, with close families and no guest. because it's your personal celebration. and i dont want any relatives either. just me, my soon-to-be partner, my parents and siblings. no offence to my good friends, as you are as dear to me as to my own family. but i just want to be left alone. actually my perfect wedding will be just me and my partner. but then you need your dad to be the wali. and mum as well as she is the closest human being to me. well...my siblings..since i only have a sister and 2 brothers..dont mind kot. kinda selfish huh. well...any objection...leh pie mampos.

but hei..it's not as simple as that. i admit i'm selfish...but i do have a brain. every action comes with its consequence. though i dont like to talk to ppl, yet i'm still doing it. though i like to be left alone, yet i still hang out with my friends. it doesnt mean that i dont like my friends. i do love and cherish and thanked them for all the wonderful things they've done to me. but it just happen to be that marriage is kinda private to me alone.

some friends told me that i revealed too much in this blog, that i poured too much of myself into it. YOU DONT KNOW ME. i wrote this blog to and for myself. it is meant to please me, not other ppl. if you guys dont like my content, so stop reading it. this blog is not meant for other ppl. it is for my complicated mind (hence the title). i need to have my mind written down so that it wont get too complicated. i need to let out my mind or else i'll be easily disturbed and confused cause i think too much. i used to keep it to myself..nearly gone insane. used to talk to azali, but he's back in malaysia and the phone bill will be very expensive if i want to talk to him everything. used to talk to wall...sewel? used to write it down on some pieces of papers..it didnt work. my blog is my pride. although it's simple and nothing compared to other ppl's blog, but i still like it. this is the place where i can write down anything, it's for me.

so..to those ppl who think that this blog is too open, revealing too much of myself (what's that got to do with you?), stop reading it. what i've written here is nothing. you cant know me by just reading my blog. YOU DONT KNOW ME.