12/23/2008 09:06:00 AM 0 Comments »

need.. more.. space.. i.. cant.. breath!

just finished my 3rd language classes. 3 classes! i know! dont ask me, i'm not that crazy to take that many classes outside my course, unless if it's compulsory. i know! apparently it's a must to take a few extra classes as a compulsory requirement to graduate. i know!

need to take all the stresses out of my system...

right. i did 2 out of 5 compulsory courses last sem, sat for the exams and thankfully passed both of them. now for this sem i have to take the remaining 3 classes, meaning there will be 3 out of 5 days in a week that i will finish at 7. i went to all 3 classes this week, what can i say, one is dead boring, one is okay-ish and the other one is so very interesting that i'm eager to start working right away. and this week is not a good week to start 3 new courses, with the end-posting exam coming up, with lots of presentations to do, thus i was as tired as a leaf for the last few days. i need to catch up on my revision, like, really soon. and it doesnt help with the fact that i'm going to kl to see hubby this weekend.

sigh. i know i shouldnt say things like that. i know i'm capable to do this. i can definitely do this. i will just have to organise my time. hubby promised to accompany me studying for next week's end posting exam, he knows how important this course is for me and i know i will get his full support all the way.

talking about this weekend's trip, gosh i cant wait! i miss hubby like crazy. it's our 2nd month anniversary this thursday you know, so obviously i want to be there with him. think i'll ask him to bring me to a nice restaurant for dinner. knowing hubby, i know he will not prepare anything haha (hubby: hah? bile anniversary? khamis ni? err kene sambut every month ke? eh dah 2 bulan ek?). anyway, that thursday also he asked me to accompany him to a friend's wedding. me like wedding! good food and happy faces with good dresses too. but damn, all my fancy clothes are at kuantan. self-reminder: should start move some stuff, esp clothes to hubby's place at kl. maybe can do that during chinese new year hols next month.

talking about fancy clothes, i lurvveeee dressing up. with my heels, and make-ups, with matching handbag, and the oh-so-nice dress. i have a few nice dresses that was inspired by the sex and the city drama hehe. i love seeing carrie and co all wearing dresses and really nice shoes and handbags. but being in a place where i live now, i dont think it's even possible to wear kitten heels without attracting attention. i think i'm the only one who wear red-coloured crocs, actually i have yet to see anyone at all wearing crocs in this place. i also think i'm one of the minors who wear a compact and a lipstick to class. one guy in my group once asked me why did i wear lipstick. ..s.t.u.p.i.d.q.u.e.s.t.i.o.n.m.a.k.e.m.e.s.o.p.i.s.s.e.d.o.f.f..

when hubby first met me after i came to this uni, i was wearing a typical student attire: a big collared t-shirt, a camel-coloured pants and with my tudung selempang, and holding my purse and mobile on one hand. he said i looked so different from the person that he knew. i admit i tend to change my attire in order to mix well with the surrounding, because i dont want to be the centre of attention. to be in a limelight is the thing that i hate most. even in my class, anywhere, everywhere, i would sit in the middle, not in front, not at the back, just exactly in the middle. i like not to be noticed.

anyway, i tend to adapt myself, physically and mentally, to the surrounding. when i'm here at the campus, i'll have my t-shirts, my flat shoes and plain pants. but one thing i cannot make myself to wear is baju kurung. i dont have anything against baju kurung, i just dont like to wear a kain. it's too, how you say it, 'windy' haha or too freely. and being a totally independent person, i need a pair of pants to move around fast and quick, and i cant do that if i'm wearing a long skirt, can i? of course i still can, but it would be too ugly to view haha. so i very seldomly wear baju kurung in the campus, think i havent worned one for the last few months. to my surprise, some of my groupmates noticed this and asked me about it and i wasnt sure how to respond.

ok back to the topic. however, if i'm outside, i'll be a totally different person, with my ironed blouse and scarf, with heels and handbag (btw, no one in the campus is wearing a handbag, except the staff and lecturers la obviously, i stopped wearing one ages ago huhu), with make-ups and everything, just like what a lady of my age would do. and i will speak in a differently manner, more formal and matured, just like a 28-year-old lady will behave. so how would i explain it to those who asked me why i was quiet most of the time, and didnt seem to join in the conversation? well, it's because all you talk about is about your crush, and her crush, and this artist and that singer, while all i want to talk about is about the recent tanah runtuh at bukit antarabangsa and whether hillary clinton is the best candidate for the us's secretary? but obviously i didnt say like that la haha.

anyway, it's not my intention to critisize the people around here. i'm just saying that as an older student around here, it is a bit difficult for me to adapt and mix with the surrounding. i know i dont have to, i have a personality of my own, but i also dont want to stand in the crowd. but one good thing come out of this, is that 9 out of 10 person who discover my real age, they came to me and said i dont look my age and that i look really young. tee hee hee that make my day everytime :D