My World

penat penat. this week has been a full one. woke up at 7am and last night finished at 9 and all i want was food, food, food, then mandi, solat, and bed, bed, bed. today i finished slightly earlier at 6-ish and boy i am really tired. i guess that it will be like this til june. weekend is revision, revision, revision. memang lembik, lembik, lembik. and you know what? i dont mind. just recently i realised that i want to do medicine. finally! never would i thought in a million, zillion years that i would say that. i used to hate medicine so much it made me sick. i hate it so much when people speak bout medicine in front of me, you know, some over-enthusiastic people who were like, 'uu today i managed to do this and that, saw this and that, wahhhh'. go and get a grip la. if you like it so much, go and share it with other people but me la. then i realised it wasnt just medicine, i just dont like people who are over-enthusiastic. those who felt head-over-heal over something. like an obsession. so it can also be a job, a hobby, or even a person. like those who are like cinta nak mati, cinta gile bobeng with someone, and trying to prove that their love is the strongest among all. tolong la. berani kate berenang lautan api badibla badibla, and seriously, if betul la ade lautan api in front of you and your so-called loved one is on the other side, would you swim across it? no. NO. cos then you will die, like within 5 minutes after swimming in that kind of ocean. seriously. PIJAK DUNIA YG NYATA la wei.

anyway, back to my point (i got easily distracted nowadays.. blame in on the lack of sleep heheh), i finally realised that it wasnt medicine that i hate. i hate when someone trying to push me into something. like when someone who had watched a movie and said it was so damn good with this and that and said i should watch it. at this point, it would be like a complete turn-off to me. some says it's ego. maybe they are right. i am just too stubborn and selfish or whatever you want to say it to accept other people recommendation. i dont think i'm that bad, i can still accept people advise, just dont overdo it and make me feel as if i'm being pushed. and you know what? i think i do agree that i can be quite stubborn and selfish sometime, especially when people start to interfere with my life. like 'oh you should do this, you should do that' type of interference. like when people start saying to me how wonderful medicine is with this and that, and reckon that i should feel the same. like hell i wont. i think the keyword here is 'should'. no one can question things that i should and shouldnt do. ha ha ha back to my ego again. is it? i dont think it's 100% ego, but i might me wrong, but again, i dont think i have the biggest ego in the world. and my point is? i'm so sleepy i cant stop rumbling nonsense...hmm.. oh yeah my point is that i like medicine and i think i want to do this for the rest of my life. and it felt good when you know what you want to do. the end. good night.