My World

i'm still in kl. i'm a bit bored.

someone is angry at me for being ignorant. huh. tell me how to deal with that.

everyone close to me knows that i can be really ignorant if i want to. guess he doesnt know about that. guess i dont know that he's very sensitive when talking about politics.

huh.

two things that i dont like in this whole world, more like i hate and dont believe in, are politics and business. everyone knows that. almost.

i know that sometimes being ignorant is wrong and unsuitable, especially since we're now living in this ever changing world. like the issue of recycling and global warming, i do play my part, like i choose to walk instead of taking a vehicle and choose a fan instead of an air-conditioner. but when people start talking about politics, i give up. i dont do politics. i think it's dirty and manipulative, although i also know that it's essential. and this is my belief and my opinion and i stand by it, AND i dont ask anyone to believe my belief, i dont force anyone to follow my opinion.

so i was quite annoyed when someone who knows me for years seems to be annoyed and angry with me for being ignorant about politics. and i didnt even mention the things above. i was just refused to join in the discussion and went silent.

before i start using abusive words, i think i should stop. i dont want the new calm and relax me, that i've been building up slowly for the past few months, to just fade away. it's not worth it.

okeh i've got 5 minutes to spare so here goes

i'm in kl at the moment. good news for someone, i hope. i myself prefer to stay in kuantan where i have my own room, my own bed. but kl at the moment is fine. weather is not too hot, so it'll be alrite. plus i've got to see that someone everyday, so it is alrite.

i had a good walk yesterday. i used to walk a lot when i was in the uk, but people in malaysia seldom, or never walk. weather factor i guess. plus the public transport is cheap too. and petrol is affordable as well. but i love to walk. good for my emotional and physical being. yesterday i walked from sogo, along jalan TAR then tembus semua house ke masjid jamek, then found my way to azali's office at menara olympia. it was a good walk i tell you.

i think i'm becoming more personal at the moment. it's hard for me to share my feeling and thoughts anymore with anyone. it used to be easy to just release it all, but not anymore. i now prefer to swallow everything and keep things to myself. and it's hard when people around you keep asking what's going on in my life. if it's anyone else, i'll say to just fuck off, but the thing is, it IS their business as well. and i found it really awkward and very VERY uncomfortable to bear my thoughts and feeling when i dont feel like doing it.

anyway, time's off. got to go.

hmm i think i should blog again.

or should i not?

i miss blogging. i miss pouring my heart out on my blog, not knowing who will read it, hoping that no one will read it, but knowing that that would be impossible.

i was also thinking of changing to a new blog address. tempting.. really tempting. i actually have thought of a new address, but i couldnt finalised my decision. some people would stricten (does this word exists?) their readers by asking for passwords and so, but for some reason i know i wouldnt like that. confusion confusion..

one other thing that i miss about blogging is writing. in english. i know my english is far from perfect, but i like writing in english. it just felt good. hmm donno why if you ask me. it also felt easier to express what you want to say (well, in this blog, write) in english.

i'll make up my mind in my next entry.

i mean my trip to london. tak sabar tak sabar!

just paid for the hotel, bought an oyster card for all the journeys there, all online. just need to find that tube map somewhere in my room. i'm sure i have one, just need to find it. what shall i wear? the hotel is so centrally located, at covent garden, and i so like that area! british museum is just a quarter mile from the hotel, and all oxford street etc are all within walking distance. great! i'll also going to visit my good cousins at sheperd's bush, since raya kan, so going to have good raya meal as well.

cant wait!

it's going to be great trip. i just knew it.

self-reminder:
1) need to find that tube map. ESSENTIAL.
2) ask nad or someone about some good malay restaurant in london. need some good food!
3) pack my stuff. maybe this weekend.
4) should i buy the london eye ticket? i've been wanting to go up there since last year, but i'm not sure whether it's worth the 13 pounds ticket. hmm.. plus i need to buy the british museum ticket as well (entrance is free, but 10pounds for special exhibition like China's Teracota Armies exhibition). hmm i'll have a think about it. need to do so quickly tho.
5) buy some chocolates for my cousins when i come and visit her and her kids.
6) what else what else? i'll give it a think tonight.

ok, i need to go to work, hopefully i'll get my pay today, so that's some extra money for the trip! looking forward to have a great tourist trip, with interesting places to visit, hopefully good shopping bargains (handbags and more handbags!), having a tub of haagen daz's belgian chocolate in front of the tele and some relaxing time in the bathtub! yippee!!

havent blogged for some time.

not sure where to start.

well i still have to start somewhere, dont i?

am still stuck in the same phase. the very same phase that i started 7 years ago. fuh. long time huh 7 years. three quarter of a decade? gosh i'm old. i feel ancient. seriously.

dont know what else to write. i found it difficult to write when i'm bitter.

well i still have to write something, dont i?

so it's going to be my 7th year of aidilfitri away from home. sigh. this year i plan to spend it differently. i'm up for a trip to london on my own. am gonna wander around. already plan to go to british museum for their china's teracota armies exhibition. it's not like they are going to come to malaysia, right? so might as well see them while i can. and there's also tutankhamun's tomb exhibition somewhere in london as well, so that's a must to see (geek!). i like acting like a tourist. in fact i like being someone totally different. anyone, except my own. sad, innit?

anyway, that's the plan. london in 2 weeks time. good. i like organised plan. just hope that the weather south is better than here up north. i swore it was less than 5 degrees yesterday. today is cold as well. damn i shipped my good coat back home, all i have now is my old one. but it's also my favourite one. guess i have to make do of it.

am currently listening to high school musical soundtrack songs. i've watched the movie 4 times already. zac efron is soo hot!! he's young, i know, but it's not like i want to marry him huh. young talents are so refreshing (hihi).

fotopages everywhere are full with babies' pictures. and i want one too :(

you know what, when i'm going back, i'm going to marry that fiance of mine, and we gonna have babies and babies and babies and babies

huh talking about desperado hahah

anyway, this is my failing attempt to write. less than 2 months to go, and lets hope i can put my life back on track. adios

i'm still here..

too busy, and lazy (more of the latter) to blog. nothing to write, well that's untrue, well there's nothing worth to write. i try not to whinge in my blog, and that consists of mostly of my life nowadays, hence nothing worth writing here. i'll let pictures do most of the talk now..

happy birthday to me :)

i've got these for my birthday:

from ellina and shanti, respectively. they know their housemate well. really well. love it!

nad gave me the chocs. no, not that size, it's DOUBLE. mmg nak org gemuk tul. dah la dark choc tu, my fav. thanks nad!

and that dress.. hehe mama got it for me. well, she gave me some cash and i decided to spend it on this bapak gorgeous dress. my first proper night dress! bile nak pakai, i dont know, but i'm sure there'll be some occasion in the future. azali likes it too, so more of the reasons to love it! and that shoes :) i bought it for myself. best best. supercomfy, and i'm a huge fan of buckles and buttons :D

but i want this now hehe. cant decide between those two. lawa... but dont think i can afford it right now huhu

or

hehe

and it's going to be the end of a 3-year era. goodbye housemates! will gonna miss living with you guys. 3 years living together, and 6 years with that girl with the red dress, i think that's an achievement! we got on well most of the time, and we shared a lot. i'll write more later... emo emo..



and i've got this gorgeous little thing too :) introducing my niece, maisarah bt ridzman. COMEL!! never thought i would care for someone whom i've never met! she's the apple of everyone's eyes at the moment, ai cucu first la katekan, my dad's first words when he hold her was, 'i'm so going to spoil you!' and that's huge, coming from a guy who used to dislike children.