whatever

7/03/2007 11:22:00 PM 1 Comment »
bosan bosan

this is what will happen if you go and sleep during the day...fully awake at 1 in the morning

what the heck, bored like hell, maybe i'll try to write something here

i'm more angry than sad. i dont think i ever be this angry before. my head tends to boil easily these days

lets just talk about random stuff

cant wait for harry potter's last book. the 5th movie will come a week earlier, in the uk, altho people around the world, seem to have the privilage to see it as early as 2 weeks b4 uk's viewers. azali said malaysia's cinemas will screen it on the 7th of july, and i know japan had its premier last weekend, and here in the uk we will only be able to watch it on the 12th. not fair. thank god the book premier all happens at the same time, altho this means that japan will have the privilage to read it first (i think) becos of the time difference, anyway since i dont know anyone in japan, so it's ok. dengki siut

i've been so bored nowadays, i read all 6 harry potter's books again already. for the 4th time, i think. they are the only books that can make me stay awake until 6 in the morning and wake up 4-5 hours later just to continue reading.

still about harry potter. jk rowling had given her permission for warner bros to build hogwarts + hogsmeade at warner bros theme park (not sure what it's called - it's equivalent to disneyland/disneyworld but it's warner bros') in florida. such an exciting news! it's due to open at the end of 2009 or early 2010, but then shanti, my housemate said to wait for at least a year to make sure everything is safe and ready, so 2011 is a target year. i'm so going! ok, got about 4 years to prepare myself, meaning kumpul duitlah, then i remember by that time i'll be surely have some kids (!).. so? tinggallah ape lagi. confirm. they'll be, like 1-2 years old, the most, like i'm going to bring them? fat chance! this is my time to fully enjoy myself with no string attach huh (am so not maternal type). hmm what about azali? i guess i have to drag him along, but i have to warn him about me going totally havoc when i see hogwarts there. does he want to go with me? dunno, havent asked. not even sure if we're going to get married.

trying to cheer myself up here...

my laptop is getting better, hopefully. as you all might know, i'm using nad's old laptop for the last, hmm, 2-3 months, i think, and i really hope to get my old laptop back soon. somebody here has been kindly enough to see/check/repair/reformat etc the laptop for me, and i'm hoping to be able to have it back soon.

that's all folks, nothing else to write. what i'm feeling now is beyond everything that i've ever experienced before, so i dont know how to handle it. all i know is that i'm angry, so damn bloody fucking angry, but there is no one, not-a-thing in particular, in physical form that i'm angry about. if you are angry with someone, you can shout at them, kick them, punch them, or kill them, for example. if you're angry with something, a thing, you can break them, or throw them away. if you're angry at yourself, you can starve yourself, hurt yourself, or kill yourself. but when you're angry at situation, angry at what's been happening to you, angry at life, what would you do? 'everything happens with a reason' badibla dibla hearing that, like a thousand times, even if it comes from some closed ones whom i care about, annoys me the ultimate most.

i'd passed trying to understand, i'd passed trying to accept, i'd passed trying to find some answers, and i'm still angry like hell. and how did i do? how do i cope? i dont. i shout and snap, lock myself almost everyday in my room to prevent me from shouting again, but the fucking telephone makes me barking shouting at those in malaysia too, so now i cant talk to them. yup i push people away from me. and how did i do now? you tell me in a few months time. or years. i dont fucking know

great. my head is boiling now. how am i supposed to sleep with this? you tell me. nobody fucking know. life is bullshit. FACT

1 comments:

DeLiRiuM said...

Buy a punching bag =)